Dysfunctions, Addictions & Financial Burning Bus, part 6
I told you about Kevin and his financial sabotage, his addictions to sex and gambling.
I shared the story of me having this trigger with my son Cuyler, and most of it going away from a simple NLP session – re-wiring some of my software.
My dad had been a pastor and he’d counseled a lot of people and if you know the stuff a pastor knows, not much surprises you.
Nevertheless I was still in for some surprises.
In ’07 I tumbled down an emotional rabbit hole and I was a wreck for 6 months. One of my therapists actually told me: “You know what Perry? You are REALLY good at hiding your sh**.”
(Why do we even bother to put the asterisk in there? Who knows. I guess it makes it more noticeable.)
Anyway, I was desperate for solutions. And actually a year before, Laura and I knew good and well that we had a whole bunch of marriage junk shut up in a closet that needed to get cleaned out. We’d taken an entire weekend, flown to California and spent all of Friday evening and all of Saturday in therapy with a couple of NLP experts, hoping to have the same kind of breakthrough that I had with Cuyler.
If only life were so simple.
I did a bunch of NLP sessions and they were helpful, but they didn’t even get close to the roots of the problem. It was maddening. We’d try all kinds of stuff, and both Laura and I would both stay stuck.
Each of us had some pretty severe childhood wounds. And without getting into more detail than is appropriate here…. let’s just say a LOT of people have experienced emotional, physical and sexual abuse. I mean, it’s EVERYWHERE. Rampant, epidemic problem.
Not only that, 4-5 years ago I started becoming aware that everyone around me had the exact same problems. So far as I could tell, no one was immune. One night at our church house group I found out that 60% of the women right there in our living room had been sexually abused.
Re-arranging slides on your mental film strip can solve a lot of surface level reactions and it’s undoubtedly useful. But as time went on – and as I tried other things – I became quite convinced that the deepest stuff operates on a whole ‘nother level.
You can patch it up, you can band-aid the reactions, you can learn to count to ten, but I could not be more convinced that mental gymnastics and self talk doesn’t even come close to healing the soul.
And I didn’t just try NLP either. I experimented with EFT, talk therapy, all kinds of stuff. At one point I spent an entire week doing group therapy from morning until evening. For a whole year I probably devoted 5-10 hours a week to focusing exclusively on this stuff. (Which is the hardest kind of work you can do.) It was just maddening.
Over a span of about two years, I found only two things that healed the soul:
1) Truly and deeply listening to myself
2) Truly and deeply listening to God.
On my Facebook page an atheist mocked me for my irrational belief in an unnecessary imaginary being. Yeah… there’s one of those guys in every crowd.
Actually I have two websites devoted to the rational, logical, philosophical and scientific investigation of the God question. If you want to travel that path, you’ll find a TON of material at www.cosmicfingerprints.com and www.coffeehousetheology.com.
But all that is external evidence and propositions etc.
It’s not experience.
Personal experience with God is a whole ‘nother matter.
But here’s the thing: The atheist has a theory. Or to be more precise, he has what he regards to be a lack of experience.
I have an experience.
(To give him some credit, there are all kinds of Christians who have never had a personal experience with God either. For 30 years I was one of them.)
The sales page for the Financial Sozo event starts with the story of Angel. Angel is one of Laura’s best friends and she almost killed herself with bulimia.
The way she healed from that was by sitting alone, all by herself with her journal, and talking to God – and being quiet enough to listen. And listening until He broke through the noise and began to unravel the lies she believed through the softness of his voice.
I had a memory of my mom flying into a rage and chasing me around the house, beating me. I was 4. I was terrified, my emotions were pegged all the way to the red and that memory was still sabotaging me to the present day. That memory was leaking into my marriage and wreaking havoc.
I spent hours and hours and hours talking through that with counselors, and it truly was helpful. But it wasn’t healed until one time when Jesus Himself came into that memory and held me in His arms. The terror melted away and the power of that memory dissolved.
Certain things would trigger Laura, and she would experience 12-36 hours of insomnia, depression and migraine headaches. NOTHING put a dent in it. Nothing. Then she received a specialized prayer ministry called Sozo and suddenly the insomnia, depression and migraine headaches were GONE.
Just like that. It took 2 hours.
She didn’t even have to remember what originally happened to her (which had scared her to death). God spoke to her through a stream of gentle metaphors and images and protected her from having to re-live a horrifying event.
The atheist has a theory. A lot of religious people have a theory, or maybe a theological proposition. For decades I was one of them.
Today, Angel, Laura and I have an experience.
Through this I learned something:
In the spiritual realm, you live by faith but only as a stepping stone.
As you mature, you become more able to live by EXPERIENCE not merely faith.
I have an experience of being healed – at the soul level.
A person with an experience is never at the mercy of a person who has a theory.
I’ve got much more to say and there’ll be more installments. Meanwhile, having had these breakthroughs, I couldn’t help but notice:
I have worked with thousands of entrepreneurs. I’ve witnessed every kind of drama, every kind of success or failure story you can imagine. Some of my students have gone from zero to net worths of tens of millions of dollars under my watch. Others have gotten nowhere.
My observation is, peoples’ ability to succeed or fail has far more to do with how clear their mind and emotions and beliefs are, than it has to do with their marketing or business education.
I’ve seen people take $1000 of knowledge and turn it into a fortune.
I’ve seen others take $100,000 of knowledge and drive themselves into the ground.
I wondered: “What if someone had a healing ministry for peoples’ financial head trash?”
In February 2011 I stumbled onto an answer. It was almost hiding in plain sight.
I’ll tell you more about that in part 7.
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