With my ever expanding interest in inner healing – getting rid of our collective “financial head trash” – and all other kinds of head trash as well – I am announcing a retreat.
This retreat is for men only.
You know it: You were oppressed.
You were held down.
You were stifled.
They didn’t know who YOU were. They sensed your true power, and they crushed it under the wheels of their uncaring, soulless machine.
They stifled you.
They put a gag in your mouth. They sentenced you to years in windowless compounds, institutions of “education” and “higher learning” where all you learned was the ways of deep conformity.
You acted out… and they punished you.
You expressed your individuality, and they demolished your dreams.
You became a well behaved, functioning citizen and member of society.
But deep inside you were ANGRY.
You held that anger down. You tamped it down with shovels. You flattened it with bulldozers, you hired landscapers to manicure it and make it pretty. You planted grass and flowers, but it didn’t change anything.
Because still you were ANGRY.
You ARE angry. Now.
Frankly, you’re furious. You’re livid because of all the universe has stolen from you.
The universe, and all those STUPID PEOPLE. Like the ones who merge onto the expressway and can’t manage to go fast enough so they slow everyone down.
Causing traffic jams. Causing lovers to not meet, deals to not be closed.
These people make you LATE.
And you are angry.
They are delaying your development. And there is no end in sight. Days of boredom and frustration until they finally bury you and give speeches about what a wonderful CONFORMIST you were.
And… to add insult to injury, your death is the final conformity. You’re just as dead as all those other mediocre guys who lived before you.
So I have a solution.
We are doing a secret retreat in July, at a secret location, somewhere in North America.
We MEN are going to go into the jungle together and together, as men, we are going to chop down a tree.
Then we are going to kill a cow.
We are going to skin that cow.
I will hand out special Planet Perry Swiss Army Pocketknives and all of us men together will hollow out the trunk of that tree.
And we will stretch the hide of the cow across the hollowed out tree trunk. And we will make a drum.
And then we will start a fire.
And finally, naked together as a unified group of MEN, we will dance around the fire and beat our drum.
Your primal scream will finally be let out. YOU will finally be heard. YOU will finally be understood. YOU will finally be understood by real men who accept you and receive you as you really are and who challenge you to achieve the summit of your manhood, your true success.
All of us will together understand how the world so unfairly oppressed you.
All of us will connect to our inner victim.
The sympathy we feel for each other – and the power of our primal SCREAMS – will release us.
After dancing naked around the fire on July 4, you will no longer be that wimpy man that you look in the mirror and secretly hate.
You will be a MANLY MAN.
You will finally be able to respect yourself.
Now this is not for everyone.
First of all, it’s not for women. (They might not find all of us particularly attractive anyway, dancing naked around the fire such as we are.)
Second, it’s not for pansy-men. If you like being a pansy-man, don’t come.
No, this is for OPPRESSED MANLY-MEN who are sick and tired of being financially and socially inadequate. Tired of being oppressed.
This event is July 4 (our country’s birthday, the day of FREEDOM) and it is in an undisclosed location.
To register for this event, call Josh.
Josh’s phone number is (866)01APRIL.
He is standing by to take your call.
We can only take a dozen.
How much does it cost?
I’m going to be frank with you… It will cost you EVERYTHING. Not el cheapo, this retreat.
But you will get back so much more.
Most importantly, you will get back….
What could be more valuable than that?
Register now. Call josh at (866)01APRIL and….
Carpe Diem – Seize the Day.
Share This Post